Star Date 02202015.....Sometimes you should love yourself like Kanye loves himself

Sometimes You Should Love Yourself Like Kanye Loves Himself

So Kanye is in the news again for being special. Not special in a good way but special with a K. Speckial. Now I bet you are wondering how this pertains to being a housewife. Well lets look at this picture: 

Yes, it is a picture of Kanye making out with himself. While Kanye is an idiot. (Not sure this is really something we need to fight about cause it's true). The love he has for himself is so real and true that it could teach us overworked wives and moms a lesson. 

Love yourself like Kanye loves himself. 

Treat yourself to a new fantastic wardrobe. 

Probably not anything made my Kanye. We are not yet in a zombie Apocalypse so no need to dress the part quite yet. Although if you are really ambitious you could design a clothing line from hefty bags and it would have the same effect as his new clothing line. 

Pamper yourself. Go out and get your nails done get your hair did or if you are like me pampering means getting a tattoo or going to the comicbook shop. 

Go eat lunch with some friends. Laugh drink have fun. 

With all the things we do for our families. It's sometimes hard to remember to take care of ourselves. Which is why Kanye is such an important part of this post. This man lives for himself. Now I am not saying we need to go to karaoke night and steal someones thunder or bust into a wedding and tell them that the groom wants to marry us and not them. But we should make an effort to care for ourselves better. We are responsible for significant others and sometimes children and animals. What happens when we get overwhelmed and burnt out? 

We end up on stage saying Bush hates black people at an inappropriate time. 

As the caretakers of our families we can not forget that we exist and that we are important. So the answer to the question is: yes, we are allowed to love ourselves like kanye loves himself. 

Just not erryday all day. 

Live long and get pampered. 

Memes from:

http://www.memecenter.com/search/kanye%20west

http://thegrio.com/2015/02/14/kanye-kissing-himself/

Star Date 10042014

So much to say and not sure where to start

 I am not a life style guru. I am a small business owner, mother and wife. I would LOVE to be able to say that at this point and time my house is perfect. It was totally clean and all the clothes were clean and in their proper place. But the truth is my house is lived in. Next to me is unfolded laundry, the kitchen has dirty dishes and two of my three bathrooms need to be cleaned.


And yet here I sit getting ready to type about something I have seen online. Because the internet gives me free reign to do so. :)

There are serious things happening in the world. Some of them are hitting me deeply and I have not yet worked out how to write about them without coming off unreasonable. Which is something I do not want to do because, what I have to speak about deserves more respect than that. What I want to say needs to be well thought out so that I will have the possibility of actually reaching someone and opening their eyes.  So instead I am going to what I do best and make you smile tonight. Tomorrow I am going to smack you all about the face with some hard truths. I want to cushion the slaps with some humor.

GOOP

I want to speak to you today about GOOP. Also Martha Stewart. Mostly GOOP. I surfed Goop's website after speaking with a good friend who will be referred too as Ms. J. Ms. J had some strong words about Goop. I had only heard and never experienced GOOP and since I like life style websites and blogs and learning about new things I wondered why I had not been more exposed to Goop. I now know why after looking around at the site.

IT'S CAUSE I'M POOR!

I am not even joking. While I know there are some things I can not do but like about Martha Stewart's brand, I do not feel bad I can't do them because there is often another way offered in my price range. I have Martha's dish set in my cabinet right now that I got for Christmas. (They were on sale on base). Goop is not the same thing. You know how I know that. The GOLDEN JUICER. What in the world do you do with a Golden Juicer. I mean do you wake up in the morning and say "I need golden juice" . I mean why?

This juicer was in the gift guide. Now if I had 4000 dollars to spend would a juicer to give to someone else REALLY be the thing I would do? Lets forget the fact that 4000 dollars is probably a whole months pay check for some people. But to spend it on a juicer?! I wish this was the only crazy thing on this list (she admits it's crazy you guys). There was a 450 dollar jacket for a child. 450 dollars...on a child that will wipe their nose on the sleeves and drag the jacket on the ground.

So from just these two shining examples I know that I am not the target of this site. I am too poor. I am not spending 100 dollars on a shirt or children shoes or 500 dollars on a backgammon game (how the hell do you play that?!).

Now we move on to the crazy that is the creator of this Goop... (what the piss does that mean?!).  I will freely admit that I do not follow celebrities very much. This is going to sound snotty...but I have better things to do Like type about them in a blog :)

So I was not very well versed in the fab sayings of GP. But now I am! So lets post up the link for you guys
. http://stylecaster.com/gwyneth-paltrow-most-ridiculous-pretentious-quotes/

Read and do not absorb. It could hurt your brain. Seriously. I mean if these are the things she is going around and saying its no surprise that people are hating on her! For example (just one I have to go to sleep since I work in the morning and have no nanny)..... I think the craziest quote had to be her comparing the negative things she reads online about herself is akin to going to war. Seriously trick? You wanna compare that to war? Or the feelings someone comes away with when in war? Don't be that person. That person who has become too rich to know when to shut up. Yes it is horrible to read bad things about yourself in magazines. But lets not get all crazy...wait too late for that.

She went to war with negative reviews and she has scars and injuries. No actually she has a Golden Juicer.

Live Long and Juice some veggies

Star Date 131019

I workout...then I cook dinner!!

In the land of the Homemaking Diva it is totally normal to start working out and get the energy to begin cooking four course meals and delicious pounds adding desserts every night for dinner. In my head I am a shapely star travelling work from home Homemaking Diva who dresses like I am 50's preschool teacher and cooks like she is a chef in an award winning restaurant. In real life I am a slightly overweight preschool teacher who works from home and is often too tired to cook....until now. 

I am working out everyday at the gym and I have dropped four pounds in the last two weeks. So I am realizing that with great energy comes great power and I am wanting to bake and cook and start looking in my cook books again to find awesome things to cook and present. I also want to throw a dinner party. So you can look out for the post of the dinner party I will be throwing and how that went. The most important part to remember about throwing a dinner party is that you do not have to be rich in order to throw such a thing and to have fun with your friends. 

Now I have discovered something called Flipbook on my new s3 phone (only my second smart phone ever). With flipbook I have been connected to some recipes that I would have never have thought to try if I had just looked through my cookbooks on my shelf or done a simple internet search. I am not sure what that says about search skills but it's the truth. 

So this week I decided to make a German Winter Stew which apparently came from the Oprah site. You are not allowed to judge my use of an Oprah recipe. http://www.oprah.com/food/German-Winter-Stew  This stew can me made in a crock pot but I decided to make it in my dutch oven. I took a HUGE pork shoulder and seasoned it with salt pepper, cumin, onion powder and garlic. This a bit different from what the site has posted for this recipe but I choose to do it with what I had already in the house verses trying to grab expensive ingredients. I also decided not to use cabbage in it because the family is very much against this idea and I did not want an entire revolt during dinner time. Their apathy to cabbage did not stop me from wanting to make this dish. So I decided to use spinach. 

I have to tell you the best place in which to obtain spinach is from the farmers markets in your area. I picked up a HUGE bag for less than two dollars, along with the apples to go into the stew. 

I cut the pork shoulder into bite size pieces and seared them in olive oil when that is done I added the onion, chicken broth and the cut up apples. This all cooks in the dutch oven for 3 hours. After which I add in the spinach and instead of cooking for another 45 I did it for another 10-15. The results were astounding. The family loved it and beside the fact that I forgot to make corn bread there were no complaints. 

   

The apples did not overwhelm the dish. Everything went together with none of the many parts of the dish overshadowing the other. I was not sure how the spinach would go over in the dish since it was made for cabbage and while Brussel Sprouts are a closer match to replace cabbage I had to find something that was not offensive to the family. Pairing this dish with corn bread lightly sweetened with brown sugar makes this a perfect dish for a chilly day. If you would like to make it the traditional way I have posted the link inside the blog you to see the recipe. Post links when you have made it to show me how yours differed from mines! 

With that I am out! 

Live Long and Be Creative 

Homemaking Diva   

Stardate.....320132

They are not housewives........

http://www.quickmeme.com/meme/367q6t/

Oh my gosh, I am writing two blog posts in a month. Hell must be getting ready to freeze over....oh wait it did. It snowed here today in Maryland. The weather men are cheering because they finally got something right. This shit is a miracle. So anyways I worked today. But it was a light day cause really who wants to drive in the snow just to drop your kid off when you will have to leave the comfort of your warm home to go and get them again.

Anyways, today was interesting because I was able to actually sit and think of a blog post today.

Reality tv "Housewives"

I think we can all agree that they are not real housewives. They are barbies. Not because they look like barbie....but because they are filled with just as much plastic as barbie. Tell me way are they filled with so much plastic?! Shouldn't they find it hard to move limbs? or sit down? I am slightly worried one of them will begin to melt in the sun. It might be the reason for the large hats. I take that back, I love hats and do not wish to insult them in such a manner.

These women have waaaay too much time on their hands for me to call them actual housewives. I mean they go on girls trips all the damn time. Do you know the last time I went on a girl trip was before my body was destroyed. True story, I went to Key West with my friend and I almost got into a fight with a dude wearing a rainbow headband and wrist band. He was hitting on us, but I think he was confused. Especially since he said I looked like one of the Williams sisters. Which is insane. I do NOT look like them and I know it.

side note: If you want to hit on a black girl do not tell her you think she looks like one of the few black actresses around...it's annoying and not true.

My big thing is that I think these shows are not named correctly. I mean they own businesses and do randomness constantly I could have swore the definition of a housewife was a woman who stayed home and cared for her family and sometimes children. So according to this show the new definition is a woman who is injected with so much plastic and wears so much make up that they can not properly sit and must constantly stand posed during an hour long show. Also you must fight about personal shit on camera and judge the other women you call friends. Because what is friendship without a little judgement being passed around.

Perhaps I am being a hypocrite. I mean I am sitting her judging these women for spreading rumors and being nasty. For no good reason. They are dressed often in expensive clothing and heels and go to exotic locations for a show where they proceed to fight with each other and talk behind their back and then bond together. So um I guess that means I am jealous? Well lets see

I can't wear pretty clothes cause I work and care for my children and they will be destroyed

I can't walk around in heels cause I work and care for my children and I would twist my ankle trying to get across the room when a child was doing something crazy *NOOOOOOOO* ankle twisted didn't make it too late.....crayon now on white walls ALL CAUSE OF THE STUPID HIGH HEELS!!

Cleaning the bathroom in designer sweats? Nope

Dusting in 200 dollar jeans? Nope

Scrubbing a pan with brand new nails? Nope

Time to get a wax? No Sometimes I am like chewbacca

Make applied everyday? Maybe sometimes I look like the joker though cause I applied without a mirror

Time for working out everyday? Lets ask the tire around my waist it's thoughts.

So the point of this post? They are not housewives so the show needs a new name. How about

Bored Bitches.

Live Long and Get to Cleaning